Dear


I am Sobenia Amanda, The only child of late Mr and Mrs AMANDA, My Late father was a very wealthy Cocoa Merchant based in Abidjan, the Economic Capital of Ivory Coast before he was poisoned to death by his Business Associates on one of their outing to discuss on business deal. With bitter tears am typing this today,my heart is heavy of sadness and my soul is dying at my tender age of 21 ,i don't know what to say in other to thank you or show my appreciation if you can help me out untill we meet together after the transfer is completed,because i have dedicated everything into the hand of God,let his will be done in my life.

My father was a very rich Cocoa Merchant here in Cote 'd' Voire and he was a very popular man before he died,so when he was about to die he told me that he had some amount of huge money (US 10.5m) ten million five hundred thousand United States dollars in his fixed / suspence account here in cote d voire and he also told me that he wanted me to go abroad and study because l am a very brilliant girl . He also told me that l should seek for a foreign patner that l should send the money to because for the fear of his family member and after the money is confirmed received by my patner in oversea l should then go there to continue my education while my patner should invest the money in a very profitable business of his or her choice since l know nothing or less about investment and the profit must be shared between me and my patner In return,i have already gave you all the clear explanation and details which enclose the reason why i contacted you for the assistance to help me transfer my late father's money over there and to help me establish an investment over there.

My dear,the must important thing which i need from you in this issue to keep everything secret between us because,i don't want any person to know anything about me and my condition because,i don't know who is who.I ran away from my late father's house since his death and hide myself in one of the hotel here in my country in other to save my life because of those that killed my late father.I don't want any person to know anything about me because,i don't know who is who,i must be very careful in everything.So please,if you know that you can't keep the secret between us,then,don't border to help me out ok because,my life is more important to me than this money we are talking about.Hope you get me clear.

Furthermore,i want you to also take everything urgent so that the transfer will take place as soon as possible because,i don't want to keep staying here,i want the transfer to take place urgently so that i will start coming over there as soon as possible for the investment and also to start my new life.I am planing to invest in a stock business and buying propertries once i come over there after the transfer is completed or What do you think?Do you knows much in this business?.

Please my dear,i want you to promised me one more thing that you will be honest and sincere to me because,as you can see that this money is only what my late father left for me,all his other properties and investments have been claim by my wicked uncle who is among them that plan to kill my father.He doesn't know about this money in the bank here otherwise,he could have claim it as well.that is why i am telling you to keep everything confidential untill we meet together.Anway,such is life,we still gives thanks to God in any condition.

Morealso,i want you to tell me if the percentage which i am offering you is ok to you because,i don't want any misunderstanding after the transfer.I promise to give you 20% after the transfer while the remaining 80% will be for investment of which you will help me to arrange over there.
Inshort, reply me immidiately and answer all my questions before i proceed because,i want to be sure of everything, then i will give you the contact of the bank where my late father deposited the money for you to contact them for more detail
There fore ,i am honourably seeking your assistance in the following ways,

1) To provide a NEW BANK ACCOUNT (please not your own account) where this money would be transfered.
2) To serve as the guardian of this fund.
3) To make arrangement for me to come over to your country to further my education and to secure a residential permit for me in your country.
Moreover, dear, i am willing to offer you 20% of the total sum as compensation for your effort input after the successful transfer of this fund to your nominated account oversea.
Please am appealing to you to please assist me so that l can smile again,l am writing this mail to you with full of bitter tears flowing down my eyes because l can say you are the only one that is left for me in this whole world.
Just yesterday my late fathers relative came and threatened me that they will kill me if l dont give them the document of my late fathers money so l went to bank where the money was saved to inform the bank director and the bank director told me that l should transfer the money abroad with immediate effect as instructed by my late father so that this poeple will not be able to kill me as they killed my Dad,the bank director said he will do his best to make sure that the money is transfered abroad,l need someone who will be truthful , loyal financial capable enough so that l can send the money my late father left for me to, once you agree to assist me by this time next week l will be waiting to hear a good news from you that you have received the money into A NEW ACOUNT (please open a new account to avoid mistrust).
Please l will be waiting to hear from you if you are really seriuos interested and capable so that l can send the contact of the bank where my late father saved the money before he died for you, so that you can request for quick transfer, and please when you receive the money please l will like you to keep it secret for the safety of the money and my life most important.

l will send the bank address to you and how you will contact them if you really seriuos and capable to help me in transfering this money abroad.
I have the believe that one day I will become a person in life if you could help me out, I pray that God will also help you, (amen).

Hoping to hear from you soonest.

Thanks And God Bless.

Best regards.

Sobenia Amanda

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Dear Morgan Sullivan,

Based on the instructions of Her Majesty Queen of England, who directed most fund of money or assets of those that died in the last London Bomb blast should be realized to their families.

I am writing to you for a next of kin beneficiary of our customer who died in the bomb blast as well, he is Andrew Adams beneficiary of A/C Number 00414610410 coded Account amount to $3.5 million. Inform us if you are related to this client, to enable us arrange and bring the money to you in your country.

Your responds:-Inform us your Mobile Tel, Fax number, Office Tel, for easy reach. On behalf of our Bank and the Government of Great Britain, We are so sorry for the lost of your relation. Confirm the Receipts of this message by reply mail

Your's Truly,
MRS.Melissa Pointer

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Thats a good one!
But isnt there grammer a bit off??
im no expert on the subject but it looks very rough :roll:

I know!! At least if you are trying to con me, proof read it first!

lol... yeah.. nothing worse than some person with tons of money they want to give away that cant spell or use grammer. :lol: :lol:

I noticed yours didnt have anything about God in it.... thats a first for me.. Mine always have God in it. :shock: :shock:

hillarious.....we get these almost everyday. gotten so used to it these days just reading the subject line tell u its a chain letter.

This one i read was hillarious:

The Best Chain Letter Ever
Hello . . .
I suffer from the guilt of not forwarding 50 billion f$%&*g chain letters sent
to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, a poor
6-year-old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise
enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a
travelling freak show.
Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone
to whom you send "his" email, $1000?
How stupid are we?
"Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by
a model I just happen to run into the next day!"
What a bunch of bullshit.
Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomize
me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by Peter in 5
AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower.
F#$% them.
If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing.
I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor,
wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from
some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times.
I don't f%$^&G care.
Show a little intelligence and think about! What you're actually contributing
to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity.
The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you
shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on.
Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana
with no teeth who has been tied to the ass of a dead elephant for 27 years
and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward
this email.
Now forward this to everyone you know.
Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will
consume your genitals.
Have a nice day.

Got another one today....



Why can't these people spell or use proper grammar?

Not exactly hoax mail, but brilliant non the less:


Below is a copy of a letter that won a competition in UK as complaint letter of the year...have a laugh and
read on.
Complaint Letter of the Year. The British do have a way with words.... A real-life customer complaint
letter sent to NTL (to their complaints dept....)

Dear Cretins,
I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for
your 3-in-one deal for cable TV, cable modem, and telephone. During this
three-month period I have encountered inadequacy of service which I had
not previously considered possible, as well as ignorance and stupidity
of monolithic proportions. Please allow me to provide specific details,
so that you can either pursue your professional perogative, and seek to
rectify these difficulties - or more likely (I suspect) so that you can
have some entertaining reading material as you while away the working
day smoking B&H and drinking vendor-coffee on the bog in your office:
My initial installation was cancelled without warning, resulting in my
spending an entire Saturday sitting on my fat arse waiting for your
technician to arrive. When he did not arrive, I spent a further 57
minutes listening to your infuriating hold music, and the even more
annoying Scottish robot woman telling me to look at your helpful
website....HOW?
I alleviated the boredom by playing with my testicles for a few minutes
- an activity at which you are no-doubt both familiar and highly adept.
The rescheduled installation then took place some two weeks later,
although the technician did forget to bring a number of vital tools -
such as a drill-bit, and his cerebrum. Two weeks later, my cable modem
had still not arrived. After 15 telephone calls over 4 weeks my modem
arrived... six weeks after I had requested it, and begun to pay for it.
I estimate your internet server's downtime is roughly 35%... hours
between about 6pm -midnight, Mon-Fri, and most of the weekend. I am
still waiting for my telephone connection. I have made 9 calls on my
mobile to your no-help line, and have been unhelpfully transferred to a
variety of disinterested individuals, who are it seems also highly
skilled bollock jugglers.
I have been informed that a telephone line is available (and someone
will call me back); that no telephone line is available (and someone
will call me back); that I will be transferred to someone who knows
whether or not a telephone line is available (and then been cut off);
that I will be transferred to someone (and then been redirected to an
answer machine informing me that your office is closed); that I will be
transferred to someone and then been redirected to the irritating
Scottish robot woman...and several other variations on this theme.
Doubtless you are no longer reading this letter, as you have at least a
thousand other dissatisfied customers to ignore, and also another one of
those crucially important testicle-moments to attend to. Frankly I don't
care, it's far more satisfying as a customer to voice my frustration's
in print than to shout them at your unending hold music. Forgive me,
therefore, if I continue.
I thought BT were shit, that they had attained the holy piss-pot of god-
awful customer relations, that no-one, anywhere, ever, could be more
disinterested, less helpful or more obstructive to delivering service to
their customers. That's why I chose NTL, and because, well, there isn't
anyone else is there? How surprised I therefore was, when I discovered
to my considerable dissatisfaction and disappointment what a useless
shower of bastards you truly are. You are sputum-filled pieces of
distended rectum incompetents of the highest order.
British Telecom - wankers though they are - shine like brilliant beacons
of success, in the filthy ###-filled mire of your seemingly limitless
inadequacy. Suffice to say that I have now given up on my futile and
foolhardy quest to receive any kind of service from you. I suggest that
you cease any potential future attempts to extort payment from me for
the services which you have so pointedly and catastrophically failed to
deliver - any such activity will be greeted initially with hilarity and
disbelief quickly be replaced by derision, and even perhaps bemused
rage. I enclose two small deposits, selected with great care from my
cats litter tray, as an expression of my utter and complete contempt for
both you and your pointless company. I sincerely hope that they have not
become desiccated during transit - they were satisfyingly moist at the
time of posting, and I would feel considerable disappointment if you did
not experience both their rich aroma and delicate texture. Consider them
the very embodiment of my feelings towards NTL, and its worthless
employees.
Have a nice day - may it be the last in you miserable short life, you
irritatingly incompetent and infuriatingly unhelpful bunch of twats.
John

:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: wow...

he does have a way with words... lmfao

MACAU CASINO JUMBO DRAW
FOREIGN SERVICES MANAGER
ASIA PACIFIC MANILA PHILIPPINES
Customer Service
Ref: MC/714
Batch: 042/02/xa1926x4/99

WINNING NOTIFICATION

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Travellers Cheque
Western Union
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DR RAYMOND MARKSON
FOREIGN SERVICES MANAGER,
MANILA SWEEPSTAKE PROMOTION
PLAZA DE MAR ZHENG MANILA
raymondmarkkson@aim.com


For security reasons, you are adviced to keep your winning information Confidential till your claims is processed and your money remitted to you in whatever manner you deem fit to claim your prize. This is part of our precautionary measure to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program by some unscrupulous elements. Be warned to file for your claim immediately. Thank you for being part of our promotional lottery program. Your Sincerely DR MRS CHERLY ERWINS VICE PRESIDENT INT.PROMOTIONS

PLEASE FILL UP CLAIMS VERIFICATION FORM AND SEND IT BACK TO US

FULL NAMES OF BENEFICIARY.....................

CONTACT ADDRESS......................................

EMAIL ADDRESS............................................

CITY/STATE....................................................

COUNTRY.......................................................

NATIONALITY.................................................

SEX.......................AGE..................................

MARITAL STATUS..........................................

NEXT OF KIN..................................................

ANNUAL INCOME............................................

AMOUNT WON................................................

:roll: :roll:

That's a Gudu one! XD

WHEN U ALREADY START READING THIS DONT STOP OR ELSE SUMTHIN BADWILL HAPPEN ..... MY NAME IS TEDDY...I AM 7 YEARS OLD WITH BLONDE HAIRAND SCARY EYES. I HAVE NO NOSE OR EARS. I AM DEAD. IF U DO NOT SEND THIS TO 15PPL IN THE NEXT 5 MIN., I WILL APPEAR TONIGHT BY YOUR BED WITH A KNIFE AND KILL YOU. THIS IS NO JOKE SOMETHING GOOD WILL HAPPEN TO U TONIGHT AT 10:22. SOMEONE WILL CALL U OR TALK TO U ONLINE AND SAY I LOVE YOU. DONT BREAK IT. [sic]

:?
This is if the email was sent once per day.
Day 1: 15
Day 2: 225
Day 3: 3,375
Day 4: 50,625
Day 5: 759,375
Day 6: 11,390,625
Day 7: 170,859,376
Within one week, half the population of the USA has died. Great..